On our very first date, Elissa and I somehow (thankfully) managed to skip the awkward small talk as we dove right into the topics that can really bond two people together. One of the things that we instantly connected on was a strong mutual desire to be parents. We’ve both always loved kids and have individually spent years thinking, dreaming, and praying about raising children of our own – picturing what they might look like, how they might think and learn, and what talents and personalities might be hidden inside them. Then, as our relationship progressed, we began to dream about these things together – what our children might be like. Shortly after getting married, we decided that before having children, we wanted to spend some time living outside of the US doing volunteer mission work. We sold our house, quit our jobs, and moved to Kenya to volunteer at a children’s home that rescues children from the street. As we built relationships with the children in the home, we began to feel and understand the depth of a parent’s love, further growing our desire to have children of our own.
Upon returning to Indiana, we were so excited to start building our family. I remembered everything I learned in 5th grade sex-ed about what it takes to make a baby, so I was pretty confident we could get it done with no trouble. I imagine most people, like us, don’t expect to have difficulty getting pregnant, so when the bad news comes month after month, it begins to become very discouraging. Through these months, it became increasingly difficult to remain hopeful about conceiving, but we were diligent to talk to God and look to Him for hope and guidance. Fast forward one year – after a year of actively trying, most doctors seem to think of this as the benchmark for what they would consider “infertility” – not to say that it’s not possible for you to conceive, just that it is apparently more difficult than it should be. We began discussing some fertility treatment options with our doctor, and Elissa started a medication to help with Ovulation. At that point, we also decided to begin exploring adoption, which is something we’ve both always hope to do. After just a little bit of research and a couple of meetings with adoption agencies, the cost, complexity, and timing of adoption were incredibly overwhelming. We felt super discouraged. We prayed together that night, asking God to show us the plan He had for us – asking why we were having so much trouble conceiving when he clearly placed the desire in our hearts. Fortunately, we didn’t have to wait long for the answer. That very week, not but a few days after our adoption appointment in Indianapolis, Elissa hesitantly but hopefully took a pregnancy test during her lunch break from work, and received a positive result! Then, nine months of excitement and anticipation brought us to the day that we finally got to meet our daughter. Kelti Matrine Pontius was born on October 22nd, and from the moment we laid eyes on her, we were changed forever. We are absolutely in love, and we’re excited for that love to grow even stronger as we discover all of the treasures God has hidden inside of her. We realize that our struggle with infertility was shorter and simpler than many others’, but one thing is clear to us in retrospect – God’s timing was perfect, his plan was complete from the beginning, and he always had good things in store for us. The blessing of a child is indescribable, and we pray for that blessing for everyone who desires it.